These Marks | Personal

Source: None via Megan on Pinterest

Let’s be honest here- the last thing I thought I would ever post is a picture of my belly in it’s current state… and UNEDITED. (eek!) And it’s notcheating that I overexposed a tiny bit in order to hide some of the zebra-ness OR that I’m posing from my left side and the right side is where Eli has always been and those stretch marks are a lot darker and more prominent. It’s called being a good photographerIt’s my job to photograph people in the most flattering light, and for me– this is it.

For the past 8 months, twice a day or more I lathered up my belly with various stretch mark lotions- I did not want them. I am pretty good about eating and did not gain a lot of weight at once, so I really thought I was in the clear. Month by month I gained a little tummy and no stretchmarks- I thought my plan (whatever that was!) had worked! Everything was great, until I got put on bedrest at 29 weeks for preterm labor. With bedrest, I could no longer be active and so the weight started creeping up on me. My first stretchmark appeared towards the end of 31 weeks, and I cried. I knew the worst was yet to come and I dreaded looking in the mirror every day.

The other day, someone shared the above quote with me- and like a slap in the face my thoughts on these “ugly things” completely changed. I hope that someone else will read the quote and find the comfort and peace it brought me.

“..it held you until my arms could, and for that, I will always find something beautiful in it”

The Simple Things

From Mama's Losin' It Writer's Workshop

Simple Things....

moments of silence

going for a walk

taking a nap

hearing "i love you"

yummy scents

christmas lights

eating your favorite meal

music

tiny baby clothes

colorful leaves in the fall

being ahead of schedule

good memories

warm sunny days

clean clothes

saving money

Source: flickr.com via Kristin on Pinterest

35 & book thoughts

Hello 35 weeks!

5 more days of bedrest & medicine.

I could jump in the air and scream!

..but of course that isn't permitted.

David picked up Bestfeeding, Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, and two more books from the Sookie Stackhouse series (8&9) that I haven't read yet on Monday, and I've already gone through the baby ones.

Bestfeeding { I feel like a lot of the contents in this book are common sense, but maybe it's because I've always been open and curious about breastfeeding- I do not think I wasted any time reading it though. It definitely would be a good book for moms who are unsure about breastfeeding or FTMs that feel like they aren't sure how it works. They're not so into schedules as they are making sure your baby eats when they want, which is a complete contradiction from this next book:

Secrets of the Baby Whisperer { I have really enjoyed reading this one. I came in with a different perspective- and honestly have had some of my thoughts changed. Tracy is big on not having your new baby set your schedule, but setting a schedule (but knowing you need to be flexible!) for your baby. Her biggest teaching is the E-A-S-Y method (which allows time for yourself every quarter) which stands for Eat, Activity, Sleep & You. She is also big on self soothing, babies sleeping in their own room, and not be "worn."

I would rec'd both books to anyone! Just because it's in a book doesn't mean it's right for you. You are the parent and can make decisions for your family. I will be wearing Eli a lot, he'll sleep in our room (but not our bed) for the first few weeks, but I do really like the idea of the E-A-S-Y method so I will try it, I may just have to modify it to work for us. :)

9 days.

Eli,

If you do not decide to push through and come before, next Monday I am allowed to get off the medicine that has been holding you in, and then it's anyone's guess when you will meet the world. I will have spent 7-8 weeks on bed rest and believe me I am ready to move around, but I have enjoyed sitting and lying quietly and thinking about you. I wonder what you will look like, I am pretty sure you have your Daddy's nose, but the rest is a mystery. I feel like it's Christmas, except I do not have a calendar with a big star on the exact date.

I am one to always think the worst, and you will learn that your mama worries way too much and creates scenes in her head that will likely never happen. I worry that I will not be here to see you grow up, but I promise to cherish every single day that God allows me. Years ago I never imagined myself making it to the point of getting married. After I met your Daddy and got married, I never imagined I'd get to experience buying a house and having a baby. We are in our new home and have set up your nursery anxiously awaiting your arrival. My dreams are coming true Eli, and it's all because of you.

Your Daddy & my anniversary is August 1st, we both agree that our best present would be a healthy baby. I am so excited to see the personality you will bring to this world. I have many wishes for you. Most importantly, I pray you will come to know and accept Jesus into your heart. I hope you find joy in the small things but work hard for what you want. I wish you confidence to try new things, and the ability to bounce back when it doesn't work. I pray you will seek to find the good in people but guard your heart. I hope you go out of your way to help those in need, just as your Daddy does.

I look at your tiny clothes and cannot imagine you being that small, and then I look at your bigger clothes and I can't imagine you being that BIG! Right now you are quite snug in my belly, and I'm not sure if I will miss the kicks to the ribs or bladder that take my breath away, but I will definitely miss the bond we have right now. Once you are born I will never again get the feeling back, and I'm going to soak up the remaining time we have together.

I cannot wait to meet you.

Confessions

1. I have never seen ANY of the Harry Potter movies.

2. I just watched the available Twilight movies two months ago, and I'm excited to see the final one!

3. I don't love my pregnant body, but I did before I got stretch marks.

4. I wish I had a better sense of fashion- I want to work on my wardrobe this year.

5. I have always wanted to be a Teacher, but got a business degree instead. Part of me wishes I went with teaching, but I do love being a photographer.

Eli's Nursery

Welcome to Eli's room!

I have never thought of myself as a good decorator, but I am in love with this room! It's crisp & clean with pops of color- fits into our style perfectly.

Fabric: Alexander Henry 2d Zoo

We had the curtains, blanket & pillow custom made..love them! I'm going to use the fabric to make a few more things for the room.

Canvases & "Eli": Painted by me! There's also an alligator canvas that greets you when you walk in the door. All supplies purchased at Michael's

Furniture & Lamp: Target

Baskets: Michael's