Thursday, February 5, 2009

Day 4

How did you do with Day 3? Were you able to purchase a little something? I'll be honest--I FAILED! I haven't left the house except to take Sadie out..the one downfall of working from home, I don't drive somewhere unless I have to get something. Although, I should have made a point to go out and get something, tomorrow I will double up!

Day 4 is to be completed on February 6, 2009

(and it's been my favorite one to share so far!)
How Precious also are Your thoughts to me . . .
How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them,
they would outnumber the sand.
-Psalm 139: 17-18
(I really like that verse!)

When you first fell in love, being thoughtful came quite naturally. You spend hours dreaming of what your loved one looked like, wondering what he or she was doing, rehearsing impressive things to say, then enjoying sweet memories of the time you spent together. You honestly confessed, "I can't stop thinking about you!"

But, for most couples, things begin to change after marriage. The wife finally has her man; the husband has his trophy. The hunt is over and the pursuing done. Sparks of romance slowly burn into grey embers, and the motivation for thoughtfulness cools. You drift into focusing on your job, your friends, your problems, your personal desires, yourself. After a while, you unintentionally begin to ignore the needs of your mate.

If you don't learn to be thoughtful, you end up regretting missed opportunities to demonstrate love. Thoughtless
ness is a silent enemy to a loving relationship.

Let's be honest. Men struggle with thoughfulness more than women. A man can focus like a laser on one thing and forget the rest of the world. Whereas this can benefit him in that one arena, it can make him overlook other things that need his attention.

A woman, on the other hand, is more multi-conscious, able to maintain an amazing awareness of many factors at once. She can talk on the phone, cook, know where the kids are in the house, and wonder why her husband isn't helping.. all simulaneously. Adding to this, a woman also thinks relationally. When she works on something, she is cognizant of all the people who are somehow connected to it.

A woman deeply longs for her husband to be toughful. It is a key to helping her feel loved. When she speaks, a wise man will listen like a detective to discover the unspoken needs and desires her words imply. If, however, she always has to put the pieces together for him, it steals the opportunity for him to demonstrate that he loves her.

This also explains why women will get upset with their husbands without telling them why. In her mind she's thinking, "I shouldn't have to spell it out for him. he should be able to look at the situation and see what's going on here." At the same time, he's grieved because he can't read her mind and wonders why he's being punished for a crime he didn't know he commited.

Love requires thoughfulness--on both sides--the kind that builds bridges though the constructive combination of patience, kindness, and selflessness. Love teaches you how to meet in the middle, to respect and appreciate how your spouse uniquely thinks.

--->Whew, okay that was a long one!!..But it was really good, right?

Day 4 Dare.
Contact your spouse sometime during the business of the day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.

The next dare will be on Monday
Enjoy your weekend!!


Jon and Steph said...

You're awesome. This was a wonderful post. Thanks for working so hard to review this book and daring us!

Shea said...

I love the fact you're sharing these dares with all of us! I failed yesterdays on account of hubby had the car all day, but I'll be able to make up for that today!

THEhooahwife said...

This was GREAT. Yesterday I had to go make sure my rent was paid on time so I stopped to buy him a book, a card, and some peanut m&ms (his favorite!).
Sadly he had already read that book and I didn't know it... =( But he was touched by the thought.

(Secretly, he is generally more thoughtful than I am, except when he is super focused. So it felt good to be the thoughtful one for once!)

littlesack said...

i love these dares! Thanks for sharing.

Lindsey said...

Love this, so fun! It's funny that the dare was this today because I just called my hubs to see how he was feeling today out of the blue and then I read the dare! Yay I passed one dare...finally!

Thanks for sharing about your tatoos, very cool!!!

Mrs. Nurse said...

Thanks for sharing all of these dares :)

Andy and Kelly said...

Hi! I am so glad that I stopped over at your blog today! you have totally inspired me!!! My husband and I did the Fireproof study with our Small Group from church this Fall, and loved the movie when it came out. I bought the book, and was very excited about doing it, but somehow in the business of life, I haven't even started. I have been trying to come up with something really special to do for my husband for Valentines Day, and I think I will pick up this book and start it today!!! Thank you for letting God use you in a great way!!! :D

Mrs. McB said...

Although I did this one, it wasn't entirely successful. Mr. McB was extremely busy this day and we talk numerous times throughout the day anyway.